Listen Up

I want you to do something for me.

First, practice this: breathe in for four counts, hold your breath for four counts, breathe out for four counts, hold that for four counts. Do that two or three more times.

Good? Now. Close your eyes, do the steady breathing, and listen. Just listen. Oh, don’t forget to come back. Ready? Go.

Are you back? What did you hear? At home, I hear the traffic on the street behind our house, and the chickadees in the trees. In the wee hours of the morning, I hear my husband breathing, sometimes I hear the dog whining, or the soft music from my son’s room. At work, I hear the highway, and whatever it is that is living in our ceiling. These are average days. On other days, I might hear sirens, or the bell on the front door, or children playing, or piano music, or any number of things.

How often do we take the time to truly listen? There is a difference between hearing and listening. You can hear a sound without listening to what is there. When I lived in Mississippi, my first husband worked at the county nursing home. I used to go and sing for the residents. There was one woman, quite elderly, who used to sit in her room and holler, loudly, for her mother. “Mama! Mama!! Where are you at?! Mama! Come ‘ere, ya old heifer!!!” (I’d get in so much trouble for talking to my mom like that!) This woman wasn’t entirely in her right mind, but if you took the time to listen, you could hear loneliness and longing in her words, in her tone. Sometimes, when you walked by her room, she would be having a conversation with her mother. I didn’t typically listen to those too closely, it felt like eavesdropping. But, I could hear love and contentment.

I have some amazing listeners in my family. My eldest sister listens in such a way that you feel that whatever you are saying is relevant and important. My other sister has a way of listening to people that lets them know that they are loved and cared for, no matter who they are. My cousin JC listens in such a way that you feel like whatever it is you are saying is the most interesting thing he has heard all day. They are role models for me. I don’t always feel like a great listener.

I do love listening to my mom, though. I call and ask her how she is doing, and then I sit and let her talk. I love that. I cherish that. I love hearing her voice, her laughter, her concern, her thoughts. I love hearing what she is going through, I always feel cheered by her positive outlook. I have also found that saying to someone in my store, that they look like they have had a long day, or asking them what they are doing with what they are purchasing, often leads to relieved or enthusiastic explanations. You can learn a lot by listening.

Listening is more than just hearing folks talk, though. I love the sound of my Dad whistling. He doesn’t whistle much any more, but it is one of the happiest sounds. You know, I used to think he wrote all those songs he used to sing and whistle? I got confused when I would hear them on the radio, and wonder why they were playing Dad’s music. What are your favorite sounds?+

We get so busy, we forget to take the time to stop and listen to the music that life provides. Go sit in a coffee shop, an airport, a park, and just listen. To the Rhythm of Life. That’s a song ln the musical “Sweet Charity”. “And the rhythm of life is a powerful beat, puts a tingle in your fingers and a tingle in your feet.” It is relaxing, to let that music of life fill your ears, your head, your heart. See, it takes us out of ourselves and serves as a gentle reminder that there is a whole world out there, that some of it is beautiful, that there might be something better around the corner. It’s a respite, however brief , from our own troubles and worries.

It may just put a song in your heart.

Tra La,

Kathie